And now the US Department of Transport are at it

..soliciting complaints about unsatisfactory holidays that is.

If only there were some sort of book these people could read...

Even the British Council are in on the 'terrible holidays' meme

The fine fine British Council, who are not at all associated with espionage, are canvassing for tales of terrible holiday experiences under the guise of teaching people English.

Why any of these people might need to speak a 2nd language when they're all too traumatised by disco polo dances and faulty radiators to ever leave their homes again is a matter for conjecture by wiser men than I.

Hugo Rifkind on Music Festivals

They're like camping, only worse:

Over the years, I suspect, I have spent too much time in tents. I have tightened my flaps on the veldt, as lions yawned 20 feet away. I have hurled bottles of shampoo at marauding Indian monkeys. Thanks to an accommodation mix-up as a teenager, I once spent a month living in a two-man tent with three boys, a girl, and a small, flatulent dog. And yet, when I am asked to consider the true horror of camping, it is to Pilton that I always return. The Glastonbury Festival, 2005. Friday morning. The flood.

...and another airline bites the dust

Keeping an airliner on the ground doing nothing is like burning money, so most airlines are pretty much a 24/7 operation.

In the constant quest to for carriers to undercut their rivals airlines are going bust on a regular basis at the moment.

What happens if the airline goes bust after you've paid?

What happens if the airline goes bust after you've taken off?

There are not happy thoughts, are they? As an alternative can I point out that the magical trifecta of Front Room, Sofa and Telly is far less likely to go into receivership while you're kicking back with a packet of Jaffa cakes and a Sopranos DVD.

Is Heathrow the worst Airport in Europe?

It's hard to say - there's a lot of strong competition.

Nevertheless, this article makes a strong case for elevating Heathrow to the coveted status of 'Number One depressing Airport in Britain'

The boss of American Airlines knows who he's voting for:

“I would have to say that Heathrow is in many ways the worst of all the airports that my company flies to in Europe.”

Plus, as a bonus, the picture caption sums up the whole story in six words: 'Heathrow - a bit of a dump'

So, do you STILL want to go to Paris?

La Ville-lumière is, it seems, in the grip of a rodent epidemic.

Don't worry though, something's being done;

A two-month advertising campaign, which began yesterday, is advising inhabitants to report brown rats to the police. Officials want them to identify neighbours whom they believe to be the source of the plague

I don't want to spoil anyone's fun (much) but people aren't generally considered to be the source of rats. It's more the mummy-rats that are implicated here.

The authorities claim that the number of rats in Paris hasn't gone up, although they fail to explain why they're suddenly so very visible on the Paris streets.

It's all in hand though, the Paris Council has created its own anti-rat team, Service Municipal d'Actions de Salubrité et d'hygiène - which also goes by the terrific soubriquet Le Smash - to exterminate the rodents on public property.

Until Johnny Frenchman has sorted out this furry infestation of the World Capital of Romance it might be best to hold off on any visits though. You could spend your Bank Holiday Weekend somewhere a bit nice. Your house, perhaps?

Everyone likes a Top 10 list

And what's better than a Top 10 list?

Two Top 10 lists!

This one, from popular geek den Den of Geek, gives you 10 movie-sourced lessons on why you should never board an aeroplane.

The sequel, explaining why you should never go into space, is even better - if a little less relevant to my premise.

Check 'em out!